When you look for the term hypergamy in any search engine the common definition for the word is: “the action of marrying a person of a superior caste or class.” but there’s so much more behind that simple answer in a psychological perspective.

In my last posts i talk a little bit about a journey of self psychological discovery and how that led me into finding the redpill. After several months of serious research and putting those theories to the test in my personal life, i realized the accuracy and of how much importance this knowledge is.

The redpill is constantly misunderstood as a group of misogynists that seriously despise women, but the fact is that it is the complete opposite. The redpill is the term used for the study of psychology behind women’s sexual strategy and behavior, in the lack of an official term for it. The study of this psychology gives men a better understatement of female’s nature and a better realization of how society is inclined to favoring women.

Men constantly come to find the redpill after a traumatic event such as a break up, finding out a partner unfaithfulness, divorce rape, etc. After a traumatic event comes the five stages of grief(denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance). The majority of men that become misogynist and give the red pill a bad reputation are usually stuck in the anger stage and sadly some of them never make it out of there. The ones that do, use this knowledge for their own personal betterment and growth which gives them more satisfactory relationships in their every day lives.

Hypergamy is the sexual reproductive strategy for women. It is the core instinct that drives them to get aroused and nest with a man depending on the woman’s current relationships state and the social dynamics at play in her life. Hypergamy as it functions, ensures the acquisition of the best DNA donor and the survival of said DNA in the next generation. Therefore, at a base level, hypergamy is instinctual and the behaviors exhibited by women are a result of this instinct. Don’t forget that hypergamy, although it is an instinct, can often be overruled by higher brain functions, which may lead to women not cheating on their partner and staying faithful in their marriage for example. The instinct is always present but the woman’s actions are not always dictated by that instinct.

As men we have nothing comparable to hypergamy and we cannot theoretically understand how such an instinct plays out. I used to contemplate that hypergamy is perhaps the equivalent to the male teenage boner that men get when looking at an attractive woman. However, it is much more complex than that. A woman’s likes and dislikes will vary with regards to what she perceives as attractive throughout her menstrual cycle and throughout her life. Hypergamy is fluid and is always changing. With men there are almost universals that men find attractive – good skin, good waist to hip ratio and satisfactory facial symmetry. Our sexual reproductive strategy is opportunistic – therefore by evolutionary design, a man will get aroused and fuck. If by evolutionary terms he is lucky, he will have a child with that woman. Men are always ready to go, on the other hand, even if women were to sleep with every man they came across they wouldn’t be ready to receive.

So as you can understand, with women it is not that simple. Let’s use the concept of the alpha male and just focus specifically on appearance for now. I would define alpha features to be that of muscularity, coarse facial characteristics for example, a square jaw, being tall, having a deep voice. In a sexually dimorphic species we have obvious differences between the sexes in terms of appearance. When those differences in appearance are exaggerated in a man he is deemed to be more attractive. This is why when women are shown faces of more alpha men compared to men with less alpha features, they preferred the more alpha men when they were at the ovulatory part of their cycles, whereas when they unable to conceive, they would choose less alpha men as being more attractive. That defining feature means that women pre-select men who are more prime genetic material when they are ovulating. The same woman will find one man more attractive over the other one based on what stage she is running in her menstrual cycle. This is nature’s way of ensuring the best genetic material is conceived and when a woman is pregnant she is surrounded by less threatening men.

Studies of women on the macroscale showed that women do not move down the classes but always marry equally or up on her social scale; a woman’s sexual reproductive strategy allows her to look for better. This is an aspect that can be crudely defined as a woman being naturally a gold digger. However, this is obviously something that cannot be defined as an aspect that has been cultivated in our evolutionary past, because money did not appear in one form or another until organised civilizations took form. On the other hand, status was. Hypergamy would benefit from picking up on those subtle clues that a man of a higher status would demonstrate such as: confidence, being part of large social circles, behaviour that inspires respect from other men and displays of material wealth in his possessions. In modern times, money of course helps a man in achieving all of those things, but as bank balances are not in plain sight the hypergamy instinct would not be triggered if his presence does not reflect the amount of money he possesses.

The social aspect of hypergamy is an aspect that many people focus on when defining it, however on the microscale you might find women that are sleeping with men that are below their social standing – at that point you must consider if: 1) is that woman is happy with her current partner? and 2) does the woman perceive that man’s social status as higher than is perceived by others? When it comes to younger men, women look for the potential of the man to rise in social standings. Therefore, do not get confused with simplistic ideas that the actual sexual market place value is all that counts. Younger men have low sexual market place value than older men, because they haven’t had enough time to work and rise in social standing. But, women can, and do, invest as their hypergamy dictates such investment when it comes to younger men. Just imagine that every girl dreams about marrying her prince in the hope that the prince will turn to a king. That is also why there are so many failed marriages as there are many princes and there’s only one king.

3 thoughts on “Hypergamy

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